Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Happy Halloween 2012


Top 10 Signs You Are Too Old to Be Trick or Treating

    10. You get winded from knocking on the door.
    9. You have to have another kid chew the candy for you.
    8. You ask for high fiber candy only.
    7. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag, you lose your balance and fall over.
    6. People say, "Great Keith Richards mask!" and you're not wearing a mask.
    5. When the door opens you yell, "Trick or..." and can't remember the rest.
    4. By the end of the night, you have a bag full of restraining orders.
    3. You have to carefully choose a costume that won't dislodge your hairpiece.
    2. You're the only Power Ranger in the neighborhood with a walker.
    1. You avoid going to houses where your ex-wives live.

Monday, October 29, 2012

Ghosts


When do ghosts play tricks on each other? On April Ghoul's Day.

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Mountain and Molehill


The difference between a mountain and a molehill is your perspective.
     ~ Al Neuharth

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Being Happy


If only we'd stop trying to be happy we could have a pretty good time.
     ~  Edith Wharton - US novelist (1862 - 1937)  ~

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Parrot to Techie Pirate


Pieces of eight!
Pieces of eight!
Pieces of eight!
Pieces of eight!
Pieces of eight!
Pieces of eight!
Pieces of eight!
Pieces of eight!
Pieces of nine

Squawk! Parroty error!!

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Be Humble


One day you're a peacock.  The next day you're a feather duster.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Miss Piggy on how to look Glamorous


For the glamorous look, choose plain-looking dinner companions.

Monday, October 15, 2012

Autumn


I love a brisk fall breeze, especially when the leaves blow into the neighbor's yard.

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Life's Journey


Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, totally worn out and proclaiming, 'WOW, WHAT A RIDE!!!'

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Crop Dusting


 On August 31, 1921, a surplus World War I Curtiss JN-6H (Jenny), piloted by Lt. John A. Macready, took off from McCook Field near Dayton, Ohio to attack a new enemy – the Catalpa sphinx moth. To the cheers of an enthusiastic group of spectators, Macready dumped a load of powered lead arsenate from a makeshift metal hopper attached to the Jenny's fuselage onto an orchard being defoliated by the insects. A subsequent inspection soon revealed that the pesky moths had been virtually wiped out by the aerial assault and a new practical application for the airplane was born—crop dusting.

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Wind


If you reveal your secrets to the wind, you should not blame the wind for revealing them to the trees.
    ~  Kahlil Gibran  ~

Friday, October 5, 2012

Monday, October 1, 2012