Life is like a ferris wheel.

Sometimes you're up, sometimes you're down.

Passport Picture

If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip. 

Everything's going my way

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

Crab

Long time no sea.

Lightbulb Change

How many science fiction writers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two, but it's actually the same person doing it. He went back in
time and met himself in the doorway and then the first one sat
on the other one's shoulder so that they were able to reach it. Then a major time paradox occurred and the entire room,
lightbulb, changer and all was blown out of existence. They co-existed in a parallel universe, though.

Bridges

When you build bridges, you can keep crossing them.
    ~  Rick Pitino  ~

The hills have eyes.

Are you looking at me?

Freedom

Have you thanked a Jeep today?

Spittoons & Cuspidors - Tobacco Museum at Duke Homestead - Durham, North Carolina

Penguin meets Batman and Robin

Orange County Historical Museum - Hillsborough, North Carolina

 

A link to: Orange County Historical Museum

If you don't pay your exorcist .....

Do you get repossessed?

You'll never hear a Southerner say:

Who's Richard Petty?

Doing Nothing

Doing nothing is better than being busy doing nothing.

Early Bird

If the early bird gets the worm, why do good things come to those who wait?

Happy New Year 2013

Ten Indications of a New Year Hangover

1. You get it into your head that chirping birds are the Devil's pets.
2. Trying to gain control of the situation, you continue to tell your room to "Stay still."
3. Looking at yourself in the mirror induces the same reaction as drinking a glass of fresh paint.
4. The bathroom reminds you of the fairground cry, "Step right up and give it whirl!"
5. You'd rather chew tacks than be exposed to sunlight.
6. You set aside an entire afternoon to spend some quality time with your toilet.
7. You replace the traditional praying on your knees with the more feasible praying in a fetal position.
8. Your catch phrase is, "Never again."
9. You could purchase a new fridge on the proceeds from recycling the bottles around your bed.
10. Your new response to "Good morning," is "Be quiet!"